At Restaurant:
Me: So, on the way over here, I was telling Todd that I figured out what it was I don't like about sewing. I like embroidery, but not sewing garb. It's the piecing together. It's my least favorite activity even on my Wee Dragons (TM). Â He asked me if we needed to hire a small Mexican child to live in the closet and sew for me. "You wanna eat tonight? Sew! Sew!"
Todd: Well, you know, I figure he can live in the closet under the stairs.
J: No, if he does that then he'll become a wizard and that's a lot of trouble right there.
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C: They still haven't made the chocolate-peanut butter pizza! Â I am giving them such a frowning!
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J: You should have heard my son on the way over here. He said that C was a cranky, old man.
C: Yes!
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At the house watching an episode of the horrendous 70's series "Quark":
J: That spaceship looks like a shark in a hot dog bun.
A: Or a pregnant guppy.
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Me: Dude! Those guys are wearing tights! Â And, not the manly SCA kind of tights either!
B: Women's tights.
Me: Yeah!
K: You can see the Bettys' butt cheeks through their shorts and you're worried about these guys' tights?
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Me: Random half-dressed woman alert!
A: In the future, there is no underwear.
C: Thank God for that!
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A as he's removing the disc: Yeah, so you see why it was practically free and I was still robbed.
Me: A, I think I speak for everyone in this room when I say, dude, that was painful. Â Thank you for showing us your love by inflicting that amount of pain on us. Â Thank you.
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During Krull:
J: She totally has 80's roller skating hair going on!
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C: Go into the Butt Crack of Destiny!
A: I wasn't thinking butt crack. Â I was thinking a little more yonder.
N: The Gash of Doom!
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Everyone: It's not a glaive!
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A: The Green Crack of Destiny!
C: Hey, she's a hippy. She's green! Â Woo!
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K: So, he's offering ruling of the galaxy and lots of bling, so my question is, "Are you hot?"
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The only 10 year-old kid present: Qui-Gon Jinn is a good looking guy!
(Liam Neeson is indeed in this cinematic mess, and that statement broke the child's mother. Â I gave him a high-five.)
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During the scene with the "Fire Mares":
K: What are they going to do, lasso them?
Me: Yes, they have lassos.
A: What are they going to do surf behind them?
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Me: So, why did the "glaive" have to hover there for ten minutes before it stabbed the Beast like a toothpick?
The 10 year-old: It had to collect it's awesome power!
Me: Fair enough.
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J: Just once I'd like to see a fantasy movie where the great evil power is destroyed and the castle doesn't collapse.
Me: Wouldn't that be great? Â The heros could move in and rule on high!
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All: Oh my god! Â They didn't list the script writer so we had someone to blame!
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I highly recommend a  Bad Movie Night of your very own.  It is totally a bonding of your politically incorrect powers.
_____________
A. is totally paying for that 30 minutes of "Quark". Â It's on now. Â I will find something so bad he will wither!

"Small Wonder." Just sayin'. But not "ALF." There were some decent moments in "ALF."